Thank you for such a thoughtful response! I completely agree with all your sentiments and really relate to your experience of attending a private school. I also personally experience that odd coming out moment when you realize someone is imagining how you have sex, that is one of the most awkward aspects of coming out because queer people are hyper-sexualized.

I too think that parental-child communication is important. I’m glad to see now how LGBTQ+ issues are becoming more mainstream, and thereby normal. I do not think that teacher would get away with her behavior today, and who knows, maybe she is a more accepting person than she was in 2003.

As for me, I feel at peace with the situation and hope my story can show folks how important it is to support those in vulnerable positions. I think we often imagine that it is better to counter the person being sexist/racist/homophobic/etc. While it is important to interrupt harmful behavior, in doing so we can escalate an already triggering situation and easily forget about the person who was targeted in the first place. That is what I learned from my own experience, and now when I see someone doing something harmful I try and find the person who was targeting to make sure they are okay.